Lesson on Love

I experienced something a few weeks ago that I wanted to share, but I felt that it was almost too sacred of a time to share through a blog post. However, the lady recently passed away and I feel that it’s fitting to now share with you all what I learned from her during her time of need. This is the lady who just a couple months ago thought it was amusing to pull me in for a big hug and snap my bra against my back. She had a quick decline and returned to our facility where she was eventually put on Hospice, and it was our goal to keep her comfortable and free of pain. Unfortunately, she suffered back pain that I don’t believe the majority of us could ever relate to and was constantly crying out and calling for God to take her. Her room is only three doors down from my office, and one morning I just couldn’t bear to listen to her crying out any longer and decided that an hour with her was worth much more than an hour of paperwork. Being the most flexible woman in the world, her back was bent all the way over with her head touching her knees. I began to rub her back and might have hummed a little tune or two. Her crying out became more and more sporadic and at one point she sat up, looked at me, and started running her hand through my hair. She said, “Oh precious, I love you, I love you, I love you.” I told her I loved her too, and she laid back on the pillow and fell in and out of sleep for about 20 minutes as I just stroked her head and sang "You are my Sunshine" (quietly). The Hospice chaplain came in and I stirred the resident just to let her know that she had a visitor and that I was going to be on my way. She opened her eyes real wide, grabbed my face with both of her hands, and pulled me in close to kiss my forehead. It was so powerful, but I didn’t fully understand why I was so moved by my hour with her until I returned to my office. I sat for a few minutes just weighed down by it all, and I realized I was so affected because she was able to love me while she was dying. She ran her hands through my hair, kissed me on the forehead, told me she loved me. She made me feel loved when she herself was in so much pain. I went in her room to take care of her, and I walked out of there feeling cared for. That’s incredible. I’m not sharing this to make you sad, I’m sharing it because I want my life to reflect that sense of compassion. I feel lucky to witness these things and to be a part of them. I hope it’s okay that I continue to share them with you time and again. I promise there will be a few humorous posts between them…