Mary Had a Little.... Laugh

(Sitting outside with my All-American football player)

Jaclyn: "You didn't serve in the military, did you?"

Josh: "No. I would have ended up dead if I had."

Jaclyn: "What makes you say that?"

Josh: "I would have done something stupid."

Jaclyn: "Oh yeah?"

Josh: "Yeah. Probably would have gotten a medal of honor.... but who cares, I'd be dead."

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(During Trivia)

Jaclyn: "Mary had a little..."

Group: "Lamb!"

Jimmy: "I've got a better one for you..."

(The group groans)

Jimmy: "Mary had a little watch, she swallowed it one day, she took a dose of Castor oil, to pass the time of day."

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Trina: "Honey, you have a boyfriend, right?"

Jaclyn: "I do."

Trina: "Oh, that's just wonderful. I bet he's very handsome."

Jaclyn: "Eh, he's alright."

(just kidding)

Jaclyn: "Oh yes, he is. You have a handsome man too! How old were you when you met him?"

Trina: "Oh, 16 or 17."

Jaclyn: "Wow. So he was your first love?"

Trina: "Oh no. There was another before him. But he was a son of a b*tch."

Jaclyn: "Oh! I'm sorry to hear that."

Trina: "He wanted the hoochie-coochie before we got married. You know what I mean by hoochie-coochie, honey?"

Jaclyn: "Yup. Think I got it."

Trina: "Like I said, son of a b*tch."