All In a Week's Work

I'm sure you were expecting my next post to be about Tara's visit to Austin... give me time, I am still in mourning over her departure. But as to be expected, it was an awesome visit and it made my life.

So in the meantime, I thought I'd post a few of the hilarious comments that came straight from residents' mouths this past week. Enjoy...

80 year old male resident wearing jean shorts, t-shirt, and silver chain-link necklace:

• "HEY, HEY YOU, throw a blanket over my legs... I don't want everyone seeing "Old Glory" as they walk by." I shudder at the thought.
• Chain-Link: "You're not married... why not?" Me: "I don't know Chain-Link... still looking for the right one, I suppose." Chain-Link: "Keep looking. Don't marry a drinker, you never know what they're gonna do next." Me: "Thanks for the tip. How'd you meet your wife?" Chain-Link: "I met her working at UT. I worked in the kitchen, she cleaned toilets. I spanked her butt." Me: "I'm sorry, what?" Chain-Link: "I guess she liked it. We've been married 48 years."
• "I see you've got crippled feet like me." No comment.

92 year old female resident with a good sense of humor and moderate dementia

• "Oh no, I forgot my glasses... can you all believe it? I'm 92 years old, and the only thing wrong with me is my eyesight... Oh, and I've got a corn on my toe, but I can live with that."
  

85 year old female resident with silver hair and a devious smile

• I was doing my initial assessment to find out her background, leisure interests, family history, etc... and as we were wrapping up our conversation, I thanked her for chatting with me and started for the door... I was halfway out the room when I heard from behind me, "WHAT, you don't wanna hear about my hooker days?!" Wow wow wow.
  
• Just today, I knocked on her door to invite her to an activity and she said,"Come in, come in! Get in here before I kick your butt out!" She laughs and then opens up her arms, inviting me in for a hug. I lean in and she wraps her arms around me repeating, "You're just precious, you're so lovely"... only to quickly find the center of my back and snap my bra, yelling "GOTCHA!" and laughing even harder.

This is why I get up in the morning.