"Move Back to Virginia"

I got into a fight at the grocery store. Don't worry Nana, no punches thrown. Just a few words.

I was making a right turn into H.E.B. (Austin's finest) when a man coming from the opposite direction tried to make a quick left into the parking lot before me. Normally, I would have slowed down and let him cut in front of me but I didn't have enough time as I was already turning. I said "Woah!" and quickly made it into the lot. He followed quickly behind me and as I glanced in the rearview mirror, I noticed he was giving me the bird. A little dramatic, but whatever. I made a few loops around the parking lot (I've seen one too many scary movies involving road rage) and finally made my way into the grocery store. I turned left towards the produce, dropped a few items in my cart, and made my way to the potatoes.... when all of a sudden....

Jerk: "Are you the lady with the Virgina license plates?"
Me: "Yep."
Jerk: "I don't know why you were SO offended that I was trying to pull into the lot ahead of you."
Me: "Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't offended, I was just surprised to see you there."
Jerk: "Well you looked pretty angry!"
Me: "No, I wasn't angry. I just said 'Woah' because I was startled."
Jerk: "I don't know what was SO startling. I was trying not to block traffic behind me." (this is when I should have suggested that he turn at the TRAFFIC LIGHT only 20 feet ahead next time)
Me: "Okay, well sorry. Although I didn't appreciate you flicking me off."
Jerk: "Well, I'm just so tired of you easterners coming in and ruining our city. It used to be so chill before you all showed up."
Me: "Wow. That is an extreme generalization."
Jerk: "You have no idea. People coming from Virginia... and California (I cocked my head at this one, which he apparently observed)... I know it's on the west coast, but I'm just saying... We used to be so chill, and you all brought so much anger here."
Me: "I've never been described as angry before, and you are the first person I've encountered in Austin to share this idea about easterners with me. Everyone has been so friendly. But that's your opinion."
Jerk: "Oh, MOVE BACK TO VIRGINIA!"
Me: "Grow up."
Jerk: "I.. I.. I am grown up."
Me: "You sure aren't acting like it."
Jerk walks away.

Okay, so MAYBE I shouldn't have told him to grow up.... but my heart was racing and I typically back down in these situations, so I felt it was important to be assertive for once. If I had been aggressive and not assertive, I would have thrown a potato at him. I resisted the urge. I don't like being told that I'm an angry person. I work in a nursing home for crying out loud. And I especially don't appreciate him knocking my home state. Since when is Virginia known for it's angry residents?

So anyways, if you're looking for a little action... head to the local grocery store. Perhaps their slogan should read "Here Everyone's Bitter". Oh but wait, that would be making a generalization, and Virginians are above that. I kid, I kid.

On a good note, that's my first negative experience in Austin. After three months here, that's pretty impressive. Still love the city, just not the one scary local.