Flat Talk

I had a heart-to-heart with one of my residents this afternoon... in her "flat". This is a lady who has lived all over the world, spending most of her time in France and New York City. She has accomplished many things and met many important people throughout her life. Aside from being a painter, she was also an editor for Vogue. Given her dementia, I asked her son if this was true and he confirmed it. She is really something. I came in from lunch today and she caught me right outside her door requesting help. She asked for a glass of orange juice (although she would prefer champagne, as she makes sure to remind me every time) and then invited me back to her flat to sit and chat. Her flat... love it. This lady is a spitfire most of the time, so I must admit that I feel somewhat proud to be on her good side. We took a seat in her room, and she delved in to a serious conversation about her relationship with her daughter-in-law. Not sure what's going on in her family or if she's even living in the present day, but she seemed very stuck on this topic. She first shared how sweet her grandchildren were and made the remark, "I must say that they're spoiled... but good spoiled, not stupid spoiled." Great way to put it in my opinion. She went on to discuss the American culture and our tendency to label people and put them in a box before getting to know them. She feels that her only labels remaining are "Mother-in-Law" and "Grandmother". She had trouble explaining to me how she felt and was at a loss for words every so often during the conversation, but I understood that she was trying to tell me that she has so much more to offer. And given her background of travel, experiencing different cultures, personal and professional accomplishments, she truly does have so much more to offer. One of the comments she made was, "America has a certain loneliness to it... and I believe it's because of how busy we stay... it hinders us from learning from each other and sharing our lives and interests with one another." Ah, the wisdom remains. While I don't believe that it's strictly America that moves at this pace, I do believe that we (including myself) are very guilty of this exact thing. However, I also believe that we make that choice... most of the time anyway. I feel grateful that my profession allows me to hear stories about peoples' lives... people from all generations, ethnicities, social groups, and so on. I just need to take the time to listen to their stories more often. Plus, won't I want someone to listen to my stories when I'm their age..?

P.S. When she thanked me for coming by, she asked my name and then repeated it back to me with her French accent... sounded more like "Jacque-leen"... I told her that I liked the way she pronounced it and she said in a matter-of-fact voice, "Well that is how it's pronounced." Mom and Dad misled me apparently. Spitfire, I told you.

Cheers!