Today We Salute You, Mama Lauer

Happy Birthday to the Greatest Mom EVER! And here are a few reasons why…

~She can stay on a pogo-stick for a longer amount of time than anyone of any age.

~She used to make my best friend EJ wear clip-on earrings to every dance before she got her ears pierced… they clearly came off before EJ stepped foot into the dance, but she was always a good friend and humored Mom until we got in the car and waved goodbye.

~When me and my friend Maggie suffered the most humiliating moment of our teenage lives (upperclassmen finding our “monkey book” that shared every secret, every deep and shallow thought… and we busted into the classroom to find them reading it aloud to a math class filled with boys all mentioned in the book… oh, I still turn red thinking about it), Mom started a fire in our fireplace and helped us to burn every page of the book.

~She has volunteered for about 75 committees and always finds a way to improve them.

~She started playing tennis in her forties… and she could definitely whoop me on the tennis courts.

~She busted her heel on a kitchen cabinet while showing me and EJ that she could still do a cartwheel.

~She can accessorize any outfit with a piece of jewelry, wrap, or hair piece.

~Her favorite store may or may not be Big Lots. She put Big Lots undies in our stockings as a joke one year. I think it was a joke….

~She taught us the words to “The Littlest Worm” and allowed us to sing it over and over again on long car rides. I hope my kids don’t do that.

~She is the most thoughtful person I know.

~She could turn a run-down shack into a home featured in Good Housekeeping. Best decorating skills ever.

~She let me move to Texas, even though it is way, way, way too far away.

~She loves red wine, and her favorite bottle costs $8.99. Hello, Yellowtail Shiraz. Yum.

~She and my Aunt Lori laugh so hard together that it makes me so glad I have sisters.

~She is the best listener and gives the most sound advice.

And I could be super cheesy and list all of the reasons why she is the best Mom a girl could ask for… but to sum it up, my best friend Tara wrote a song about her in college. Yes, Mama Lauer has got it goin’ on. P.S. Tara, do you remember writing this?!

Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on
Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on
Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on
Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on

Off to Jaclyn’s house to get away from school (away from school)
We’ll go out in C’ville maybe act a fool (act a fool)
Hope your mom is home from her tennis match (tennis match)
Mr. Lauer’s lucky ‘cause his wife’s a catch (his wife’s a catch)

You know I love it when your mom makes cheesy eggs for me
She’s just so hip and sassy now, people can’t you see?

Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on
She’s all I wanna be when I am that young
Jaclyn can’t you see, I’m so glad you’re friends with me
That’s why I wrote this song, Mama Lauer you are totally the bomb

Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on
Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on

Jaclyn, do you remember when we played ‘what-if’? (played ‘what-if’)
Your mom’s great answers made me laugh in a jif (laugh in a jif)
I’m sad I missed her dance to the song ‘my humps’ (song ‘my humps’)
But love that she won’t take no crap from any crazy chumps (crazy chumps)

You know she was so kind when I got my mullet
So I didn’t return to Master Cuts with a bullet

Jaclyn’s mom has got it goin’ on
She’s all I wanna be when I am that young
Jaclyn can’t you see, I’m so glad you’re friends with me
That’s why I wrote this song, Mama Lauer you are totally the bomb

Happy Birthday, Mom! I love you!!!